This is something that I have very mixed feelings about. On the one hand, I completely broke my promise, spent money I don't really have, and have put myself into a corner. On the other hand, I bought a fabulous Burberry silk wrap dress that was originally $850 for $26.02, after my employee discount and taxes. Yes, that is twenty six dollars and two cents, a ridiculous discount of craziness.
Originally, I thought that it was almost $400 because that is what the price tag said when I picked up the go backs from the registers. I notice that it is a lovely item and hand the garment off to the Women's Department because it belongs there, then continue working. A few minutes later B., the Men's Department manager, comes running in and starts frantically asking where that dress is. Turns out that it was a return and only $30 because it had gone on discount since the customer originally purchased it. This news was unbelievable, and the tale went around where everyone commented that it was fake and not possible and whatnot. I was seething with jealousy, but at the same time I figured that it was better for a coworker to get such an amazing find.
A couple hours down the line, once the store has closed, I notice the dress hanging in the reticketing area instead of the hold area. This doesn't seem right to me, so I ask M., the woman working in the fitting room, and she said that B. tried it on and it didn't fit her. My mind cannot be pulled away from this dress, so I look at the size and, lo and behold, it is a 10R, just my size. M. makes a comment that my boobs will be too big for it, but that I'm welcome to try it on. Shrug of the shoulders and the sweater comes off right there so I can pull the dress on over my tank-top. Well, it looks just great. Absolutely great. The tank-top really makes it look classy, because otherwise it would be a little obscene on me. No harm in admitting that M. is right, my boobs are huge, especially when you are a tiny woman, as in very short and very skinny, like M. is.
My assistant manager sees me in the dress and tells me that I could buy it right then if I hurried because the store was closed and the cash registers needed to be counted soon. I practically skipped up to my locker, slipped my card with the rewards points into my utilipocket (that would be my bra), skipped back to the registers and handed that dangerous piece of plastic over with a grin on my face. Half a second after the card was swiped is the exact moment when I realized that I might not have enough money in my account. I cross my fingers and break out into a sweat. The transaction was approved, but my mind was going over the terms of the card, which is linked to my checking account, which states that if I am declined 3 times, then I'm fired for being untrustworthy with money, or some other PC, don't-sue-us-for-canning-you phrase. The feeling of holding your breath and hoping that you didn't totally fucker yourself is not one I am fond of, but one that I am becoming increasingly familiar with.
Guess that today was a very alcoholic moment: I promised that I wouldn't do it, I think about it obsessively, then I do it despite my better judgement, and top off with promising that this was the last time. Sadly, it better be, I don't think that I actually have enough money in my account to pay for this dress and I have no idea why it went through. Tomorrow, before work, I am going to return those Halloween items and cross my fingers. This is a point when I am very glad that I do not have a credit card. This may sound contradictory, but I recognize that the same thing would be happening, except that I would be up to my ears in debt and just trying to keep my head afloat if I had a credit card. It is tragic to realize that I am so terrible with money.
*Sigh* Rammen is not too bad and I was able to snag three pieces of pizza to have for breakfast/lunch tomorrow so at least I won't have to starve. While I know that a new job will remove such temptation as a daily issue, I seem to be finding the job search very difficult and slow going. It seems like every time I start to move an inch in the right direction, other things drag me away. The rational part of my mind realizes that it is unreasonable to have a job just fall into my lap, but there is a portion that expects an amazing career to drop from the sky.
Picture found on the eBay posting for a size 4 of the exact dress to be found here and that bidding ends on November 1st, just 2 days and 15 hours from my posting this.
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